Friday, February 25, 2011

Student athletes

NCAA's new president says paying the people directly responsible for making them million of dollars is out of the question

So we're still back to the arguement that the scholorship they get is enough.  If this were 1970, that might be a valid arguement.  Hell, even in the 80s.  The problem is, 2 things have changed in the last couple decades that have made this arguement worthless.

1 - college athletics, mostly football and basketball have undergone a shift in which they are now running as a business.  I'm pretty sure that alumni contributions aren't even really needed at some of these schools.  Not that that would stop them from asking for some.  What these athletes are bringing the school has shot up.  It's no longer about what kind of honor and fun they bring to students and alumni, it's about what kind of money and sponsors they bring to the school.  Bottom line: they are getting more from the athletes.  (remember that part, i'll get back to it)

2 - These college degrees are worth less than they used to be.  There was a time where a college degree meant you were set.  You had a job.  Unless it was liberal arts, that's always been a crap shoot.  Paying an athlete with a college degree was saying, "look, even if you don't go pro, you have a future and your hard work will pay off."  Not today.  Nowadays, paying with a college degree is saying "hey sucker, thanks for making us a few million.  unless you killed yourself and got a degree in engineering or something that is useful, have fun waiting tables at Applebees alongside pretty much everyone else that left this college with a bachelor's degree."  Bottom line: what colleges "pay" is less.

which brings us to the equation.....  (what colleges get from athletes hard work) + (what colleges are giving athletes in return) = you need to start paying these guys you greedy assholes.

- it's funny, i hear the point made that football or basketball jocks coast thru college.  Hell i've heard from more than one person that people in classes with Vince Young said they never saw him in class ever.  The more i think about it, the more i'm forced to say that I don't see a problem with that.  I mean think about it.  The degree is the "payment" and it's not even guarenteed.  It's like they're paying with a CHANCE to get a degree.  It's like if I built you a house and you promised to pay me with a new car, but when I go to get my paycheck you give me a ticket to be on The Price Is Right.  How the fuck is THAT fair?

Oh well, I doubt this is going to change.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Job questions

So i came across this blog post that talks about how some companies are getting creative in the job interview.  It also lists some that are kinda out there.

Here is the blog

I'm grabbing questions from the article that people say they've been asked and giving my answers.  Questions in italics, my answers in bold.  Enjoy.

If you were a superhero, who would you be and why?

Superman, because he's the greatest.  DUH

If every time you entered a room your theme song played, what would it be and why?

the indiana jones theme.  and i'd have a boulder follow me in the room.  cuz that's how i roll.

On a scale of 1-10, how weird are you? Why did you choose that number?

10.  *shrug*

What was your best MacGyver moment?

i once made a bazooka out of a paper clip and a stick of chewing gum.

If you saw someone steal a quarter, would you report it? If not, what dollar amount would you report?

depends.  do i KNOW they're stealing it?  beyond a shadow of a doubt?  if so i'd confront them with a "really dude?  you're going to get fired over a QUARTER?!?!?"

“I was once asked what I would bring if the department had a potluck.” - Amanda L.

a case of Monster and a healthy appetite.

“If you were a sea creature, what would you be and why?” - Jay D.

do penguins count as sea creatures?

“What color is your brain?” - Connie B.

depends.  still bloody?  fresh? 

“If you were a professional wrestler, what would your stage name be?” - Alyssa Giustino, KEH Communications


“How many airplanes are in the skies over the US right now?” - Timothy R. Yee, Green Retirement Plans, Inc.

if i actually knew that you think i'd be applying HERE?

“How would you open the locked and sealed window in this hotel room?” - Yee

i could try tossing someone thru it.  how much do you weigh?

“I was asked, if I went to the moon and can only bring three things, what would I bring? Oxygen and food were already provided. I said my bed — had a great mattress then– my friends and a dog.” - Cindy Holtzman, Medical Refund Service, Inc.

a bitchin moon buggy, a PC full of games and porn, and a death ray to hold the world ransom for.... one MEELLION DOLLARS!!!!

“I was asked if I knew how to make explosives, [right] after 9/11, in an interview for an administrative assistant position.” - @danileo1

would you settle for 4 alarm chili?

“What kind of car do you drive?” - Susan C.

a sad piece of shit that makes me sad every time i sit inside it.  next question, no i will not elaborate.

“Will you file my fingernails?” (For a position at a church.) - Autrey K.

under "F" for fingernails?

“I interviewed for a [job] waiting tables and the manager wanted to know how I would eat an ice cream cone.” - Peggy M.

uh.... yeah see the thing about that.... *runs*

“I was asked what my grade point average was in college. I have a BS, MS, Ph.D. and spent two and a half years as a postdoctoral scholar in a government research lab.” - Charles T.

1.5.... no wait that was my blood alcohol level.. no wait... DAMN!!!!  i need a do-over.

“If you had been on the Titanic would you have been in a row boat, on the ship, or freezing in the water? If you were a Spice Girl, what would you call yourself? How would you feel about doing small personal errands like dog-sitting or buying gifts for my ‘lady friends?’” (All from the same interview.) - Trina Rimmer,

i would escape in my jet pack.  you didn't think i'd go back in time to the Titanic without a plan did you?  I'd be surly spice, a real fucking ray of sunshine.  I'm going to assume by "errands" you mean deliver pizza and clean pipes.

“Who won the Super Bowl last year?” - Kevin D.


“So, are you married or whatever?” - @KYProgressive

hell no

“Kids you don’t have one of those, do you?” - Lois C.

god no

“Have you ever used state assistance?” - Katie L.

hell no

“Do you have migraines? Do you have small children? Do you like long vacations?” – Krishna S.

migraines.... only around small children.

“Do you attend church? What is your denomination?” - Katie B.

 HA HA HA HA!!!  good one.

“Do you spank your child?” - Karen

had i children i would rend them mercilessly.

“The strangest question I received was in regards to astrology. He was a real estate agent you wanted to know my date, time and where I was born. He wanted to see if we were a match. Needless to say I didn’t get the job.” - Teresa Turner,


“Are you gonna stay or just practicing for the next job?” - @soyflz

am i going to be given a reason to stay?

“Where do you see yourself globally?” - Andrew B.

lemme check the ole GPS....

“What is a secret about you that no one knows?” - Daniel S.

oh sure, i'll tell a total stranger.

I was asked “If you opened your sock drawer, what would it look like?” - Nancy Dahl. SheTaxi

what sock drawer?

“So if I were to go out and get a few drinks with your friends, what would they tell me about you?” - Kristin Rose

you seem like a nice person, don't piss Jimmy off.

“What is your favorite movie?” - @DMRyan711

i don't know.  it changes constantly.

“What’s the funniest Youtube video you have seen lately?” - @byuboston

a kitten clawing at food.

“What wine do you drink? What is your favorite bouquet?” - @Durudarshan

yeah, i don't do wine.  sorry.

“Which Winnie the Pooh character do you relate with the most and why?” - Celie H.

half Eeyore, half tigger.  i'm a person of extreme moods.

“If you were a Disney character, what character would you be and why?” - Jayne S.

I wanna be the prince from Snow White.  how awesome is that?  wandering around and oh hey there's a hot chick lemme just give her a smooch and poof she's up and she's in love with me.  time to get my freak on with a girl who's going to be tickled pink she's with a man over 3 feet tall.

“If a movie was made about your life, who would play you and why?” - @tofuti2001

The Rock.  because *punch* that's why.

“If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?” - Jerry h.


“I was once asked if my closet was organized” - Crissy Landreth

yeah sure.  it's organized into clothes on hangers and clothes on floor.

American women.... STFU

So I was reading an article talking about basically how Tunisia is facing some hard choices now and one of them is what and how big a role religion will/should play in the political landscape of the future.

Worth a read.

Anyways, the reason i'm posting is to point out a part of the article i read that made me say "god damn, the chicks in this country really don't know just how good they got it.  I swear the next girl I hear complain about how OPPRESSED women are here i think i might have to slap her."  Here's the part.....

She shared in the joy of the overthrow of what she described as Mr. Ben Ali’s kleptocratic government. But she also says she believes that the government’s crackdown on any Muslim groups it considered extremist, a draconian police program that included monitoring those who prayed regularly, helped protect the rights of women.

OK, so to summarize.... if she were talking about here she's basically saying that the only way she'd feel safe is if the government were allowed to and frequently did, watch and occasionally kick the shit out of the Westboro Baptist Church and the Mormons.  That's how fucking bad it is.  The chicks in that country WELCOME a government that engages in religious oppression of sorts. 

I also had to stop and wonder "how the fuck is it that they get it over there we still can't get our leaders or the people who elect them to get it over here?"  when i read this.

Protesters held up signs saying, “Politics ruins religion and religion ruins politics.”

I know we like to PRETEND there's a separation of church and state in this country, but until i start seeing some open Atheists elected to high government positions, I call bullshit.

Monday, February 21, 2011

College pricks

Note to self:  go to Columbia University and just kick everyone in sight's ass.  They've earned it.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Top 11 things

Ok this is funny.

top 11 things in the new star wars blu ray release.

cooties... ew

Ok so we got a story about a high school (home schooled) guy who refused to wrestle a girl.

So here's the thing.  He says it's because his "religious beliefs" which then goes on to give 2 different possible specifics on that.  Both of which are horseshit.  Either....

reason 1 - the sport involves some violence and with a girl involved it's a bad thing.

why it's BS - i'll admit i'm not very well versed in the Pentacostal religion, but i'd love to see the part in which violence against women in the slightest is EXPRESSLY forbidden.  oh and if it turns to violence then that means you suck at it.  there's a reason wrassling and wresling are 2 different things.  This isn't the WWE and you arne't being asked to go out and give her a Stone Cold Stunner.

reason 2 - this is the reasoning i think is the real reason why....  Jamie Northrup is a minister in the Believers in Grace Fellowship, an independent Pentecostal church in Marion that believes young men and women shouldn't touch in a "familiar way," said Bill Randles, the church's pastor.

why it's BS - Ok so let's follow this one to the logical conclusion shall we?  They're saying that the act of wrestling means the contestants are touching in "a familiar way" in other words, they are engaging in activity of a sexual nature.  So wouldn't that make all the wrestling he's been doing with the guys GAY?  I mean, they just admitted that just DOING the wrestling was a sexual act.  He wasn't asked to pin and fuck her, he was asked to do the same thig he does to all the guys and he said he couldn't because it apparently is ok to do sex stuff with guys but not girls.  Once again, i'm not an expert on the Pentacostlas, but I have to imagine that they aren't cool with homosexuality. 

either way, all this talk of "he's so brave for this decision" crap is total horseshit.  he's a candyass pussy and deserves to be ridiculed till he cries.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Fuck you Iraq

I don't think i could possibly tell them to go fuck themselves any harder after reading this.

Ungrateful assholes doesn't even scratch the surface.


Good news: Detroit will be getting a Robocop statue.

Bad News: you have to go to Detroit to see it.

New favorite site

My friend Phil pointed me to this site the other day.

Don't even reply

basically it's some guy emailing replies to ads and just fucking with people.  It's fucking hilarious.

Like this one.... Angry TV buyer

I just love how the guy comes totally unhinged at the end.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Hottest in the sky

The list of hottest flights attendants is out.

Not one single airline from this country.  How is it that Hooters airline didn't make the cut?  I'm guessing this poll they took was people travelling outside the U.S. 

Dumb and dumberer-er-est

Racist black woman (cuz let's face it, if you read what she says that's all it really is) has issue with a Superbowl commercial. 

what's funny is that what she says isn't the most upsetting thing about all this.  not even the thought that she wastes tax-payer money in a state that does NOT have the cash to burn every time she opens her goddamn mouth.  no, what's the most upsetting thing about this is the thought that SHE WAS ELECTED.  someone actually listened to what she has to say and said "yup, sounds good to me."

i agree with one of the commenters in their assesment of her "if she were any dumber we'd have to water her."  and then remember someone actually put her in a position of power.  i dunno bout all of you but i'm ready to jump off a bridge.

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

NFL grand stage

I understand the anger.  I understand the desire to see the increasing trend of rewarding only the well-to-do, done away with.  I understand every single word printed in this opinion piece.

What I don't do, is sympathize. 

We made this monster.  We birthed it, we fed it, we nurtured it as it grew, and now we have to deal with the fact that it's gotten huge and out of control.  The fact is, it isn't going away any time soon.  Why should it?  Sure you can write a nice piece saying "i think it's a travesty that 1200 people spent a ton of money only to be turned away!!!"  But you know what Goddell and Jerry are going to read?  That this Superbowl was the highest rated ever.  Those are the numbers that talk to those guys.  The average joe bag-o-donuts can bitch all he wants about how he and the rest of the common man are being priced out of the game, but as long as those same commoners are paying money for Jerseys, Cable channels, and other products IT'S GOING TO KEEP HAPPENING. 

It's the same reason all you rubes are paying $10 to go sit in a movie theater and watch recycled garbage, because you're wiling to pay $10 to go sit and watch recycled garbage. 

I don't blame any of the parties involved in sucking us all dry.  If we're all stupid enough to pay, then more power to anyone smart enough to take our money.

Rail to the future

So about Biden's $53 BILLION rail project.....

- it'll never actually get built.  Between the logistics, the hassle of unions, the environmental groups that will be bitching up a storm, the different states and their laws and whatever.... it's never going to happen.
- if by some miracle they hurdle all that and actually DO build it.  there's DEFINATELY no fucking way it gets done for the price he's quoting.  If my years in government contracting taught me ANYTHING, it's that the first price agreed on is never the full cost.
- This isn't to say that this isn't something that SHOULD be done.  America always needed a European-style rail system.  The problem is, we're way more spread out than they are and we value using our cars more.
- With our airlines unwilling/unable to reduce cost or reduce the pain-in-the-fucking-ass factor of using them being able to jump on a quick and reliable train might be nice.
- Reality is, there going to be too many hurdles for this to ever see light of day.  Too many hands looking to dip into the honey pot.  Too many groups wanting a say in how this gets done.  It just won't happen.

I understand the Obama administration's desire to do this, and I applaud them for thinking big I truly do.  The problem is, he wants to do some grand public works projects like they did back in the old days.  Like building Hoover Dam or something.  It's ambitious but this isn't the old days.  Regulations are different.  We don't get things done like we used to.  Back in the day if we were trying to get a road built and a bunch of hippie fags came along and said we can't do it because we might harm mother earth, well we'd just kick those pussies in their fucking heads and build the fucking road.  Now?  We actually listen to these pricks.

oh and another reason this won't happen.  money.  The GOP will never give him that kind of money to burn.  KIND of rightly so.  Right for the reason of, they know damn well it's going to go up in smoke and we can't afford to burn money.  Wrong for the reason of being vendictive assholes (which they've been doing with increasing frequency). 

Monday, February 07, 2011

I can haz lawsuit

This is sad.

no, not the bill itself, the fact that such a bill is even NEEDED is what's sad.  It's really simple, if you spend your time shoveling greasy fast food in your mouth like me, you end up a misarable fat blob of lard like me.  You don't get to sue anyone.  You just get fat. 

Oh and don't give me that "but their advertising is so good...."  you mean EFFECTIVE?????  that's the point of it.  Short of dragging you into the resturaunt and beating or kidnapping you and implanting a chip in your brain, they can do whatever it takes to make you want THEIR products. 

Friday, February 04, 2011

Cyber fail

Article on how the Obama administration is a bunch of tards when it comes to cyber security.

Not shocking, but not really Obama's fault.  It's always been that way and it always will due to the nature of how our government operates.  See, in our government we tend to put people in charge who don't really know shit about that they're in charge of.  The guy making the rules for cyber security probably couldn't even tell you what a flash drive is.  The other problem is that these people have experts to help them but they aren't interesting in listening to them.  EVER.  They decisions they make are based on what they can make it look like they're doing rather than actually getting something done. 

When the government appoints an actual nerd with geek cred in charge of cyber security instead of some suit, i'll believe they're serious about it.

Thursday, February 03, 2011

Think about it

So I was reading different stories on the Egypt thing and in a few comments I saw this quote from "V for Vendetta"

People shouldn't be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.

Now when you first see it and you think about the romantic notion of fighting the power that sounds like a damn good quote.  Then I thought about it for a minute.  Wait, the Government AFRAID of something?  That's not good.  A government is made up of people.  People with the same weaknesses and reactions as the rest of us.  (something i think most people forget nowadays).  The government isn't some computer that makes a mental note of 'do not piss off the people'.  If a government AKA the people running the show are afraid of everyone what do you think is going to happen?  BAD SHIT.  fear is never something you want to happen to someone in power.  Fear tends to bring out bad, hasty, extreme decisions in people.  Once again, NOT something you want the people who run the whole show to be expreiencing. 

If god exists, he hates Jimmy Ballard: reason #too many to count

Kristen Stewart?  Seriously?

Bad enough all our best comic book heros are being played by Brits, now we gotta give away key roles to shitty actresses?

Will I EVER see a fucking awesome Superman movie in my lifetime?????

UPDATE:  bullet dodged.

UPDATE2:  ok so if he doesn't hate me, he certainly hates comic book fans.  i think the comic industry would be greatly served by a good Wonder Woman movie or tv show.  Sadly, Hollywood decides "let's just totally fuck this up."

UPDATE3:  why aren't American men being cast?  well according to casting agents, because American men are a bunch of pussies.  this of course begs the question, "well why do you assholes keep hiring pussies?"  maybe if you fuckheads hired men who are real men and unashamed of it we wouldn't be stuck with a bunch of candyasses too meek to be convincing superheros.

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Gamer girl FTW

New world record for female gamer.

Stats on this girl D&D style.

Gamer chick +10
hot asian girl +5
really good at guitar hero +20
(the numbers don't mean anything i just wanted to make it look cool)

so yeah, hot asian girl gamer.  i am officially in love.

Tuesday, February 01, 2011