Monday, December 31, 2007

Snowplow

Those wacky Japanese. now they've made a robot snowplow that scoops up snow in front, and poops out snow-bricks in back.

check it out

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Saved movies

11 movies made BETTER due to historical inaccuracy.

#5 - read the "why it would have sucked otherwise". i agree 1000%

What song?

what song is he signing. guess before the halfway point!!

Friday, December 21, 2007

Confidence

my sister and i were watching a rerun of "so you think you can dance" earlier today. it got me thinking about confidence. see, there's different kinds of being confident.

- repeaters confidence. this is the person talking over and over about how confident they are. "you can do this, you can do this....." this is a scared bastard who's barely hanging on. fucking with this person is not only easy, but fun.

- confidence by proxy. mostly a team thing. you got one or two guys who are good to go and the other guys are counting on them to stay strong. this backfires though when the keystone guys get taken out. like if Kobe went down in a game. you can't tell me the rest of the Lakers wouldn't all want to just go back to the locker room and cry.

- straight denial. this is the confidence you see mostly on fat chicks. you know the ones. "i look GOOD...." no honey you don't. you're fat as hell and the guys only pay attention because you put out and you give good head. come to think of it, it's pretty much only chicks who have this kind of confidence.

- OVERconfidence. this is kinda like denial but mostly found on guys. you know, like the guys who are screaming at nobody. "ALL RIGHT LET'S DO THIS!!!! I AM GOING TO FUCKING ROCK THIS SHIT!!!! WOO!!!!!! YEAH BABY!!!!!" just stay the hell away from these guys and have a camera ready.

- gang leader. this is being confident because you got people backing you up. pretty much any pussy in a gang. he's all mouth and shit talk because he's got his boys backing him up. get this guy alone and he's a little bitch. pathetic.

- false confidence. this is the kind you see in movie stars and celebs. they have people kissing their asses nonstop so pretty soon they figure nothing they do is wrong. honestly, i don't blame them for it. any damn one of us would act the same way if we had people reacting to us the way people react towards celebs now. you're full of shit if you think you wouldn't.

- genuine confidence. this one is easy to spot. it's the person who isn't saying anything. someone who is sure of them self doesn't need to flaunt it.

Album covers

want 20 reasons to poke your eyes out with a knife?

20 worst album covers

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

2008 in movies

2008 should be box office gold.

what I'm looking forward to most?

- Rambo (the trailers are great, and Stallone did a damn good job bringing Rocky back)
- Iron Man (seriously though, who ISN'T looking forward to this one? you suck if you aren't)
- Speed Racer (it's either going to be really really good or suck something fierce.)
- Semi-Pro (i think will farrell is going to be doing every sport. i look forward to his chess movie.)
- The Dark Knight (will Ledger do Joker justice? early reports seem to say YES.)

Greenpeace mad again

it's always something with these douchebags isn't it? well this time, greenpeace is hoping mad because a Japanese aquarium is putting santa hats on whales.

read for yourself

you can't make this stuff up.

my only question in this is, why is this news? why is greenpeace making a stink about this and getting some coverage while untold masses of dogs are subjected to doggie t-shirts and costumes on a regular basis? why aren't we kicking THOSE people upside the head? i hate dogs, but for god's sake i would at least allow them to keep their dignity.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Fight Scenes

way back when i was in Afghanistan i was working on a series of lists. It was a bunch of lists under the massive heading "best fight scene". it was a series since there are so many ways to classify fight scenes. guns or no guns? weapons or hand-to-hand? best music? vehicles? i never really got anywhere with it. in fact i only got a few entires into the "best start to a fight" list. i found it while digging up some old documents i had backed up on CD. here you go.


BEST START.

1 – CONAN THE DESTROYER. The crypt fight. Conan whipping out a knife and with a simple “Enough talk!!” he starts some shit. Classic Arnold.

2 – SUPERMAN 2. The big showdown. This was a great opening to a great fight. “Come son of jor-el, kneel before zod!!!” how much better does it get? This was not only a great opening, but it set the stage for a classic comedy moment in Mallrats. You better know what I’m talking about.

3 – STAR WARS RETURN OF THE JEDI. There are several fights in this movie that all start great. Like the pit of Carkoon. Everyone is held captive, about to be executed, Luke is walking the plank and things couldn’t looks worse. And in the span of a couple seconds with a simple hand-signal Luke signals R2 and next thing you know he’s gone from about-to-die-captive to opening-can-of-whoopass-jedi. That’s just friggin awesome. The lightsaber duel between father and son. Luke gives into the dark side and gets ready strike down the emperor. But there’s darth…..it makes it clear to Luke he can’t escape a confrontation with him.

4 – DESPERADO. The big showdown between Antonio and his boys against the bad guys. “let’s play.” Simple yet effective.

5 – MATRIX. Lobby shootout. I think we all reacted the same as the guard when Neo opened the jacket showing a fucking arsenal underneath. “holy shit!”

6 – ALIENS. The fight in the cooling tower area. “Let’s rock!!!!” that’s awesome. Vasquez was such a badass.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Global Carbon tax

Hey UN, fuck you.

UN wants to steal U.S. money disguised as fighting global warming.

if this shit passes, i'm done paying taxes. come put me in prison, i don't give a fuck. i am not handing over my money so it can be handed to these fuckholes.

WTF moment

today's "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?" moment is brought to you by Josh Ballard, the mayor of rantville's brother.

So Sportscenter is asking a question that pretty much made my head explode.

"will snow be the equalizer in the Jets-Pats game?"

I'm sorry but am i in an episode of Sliders? did i somehow shift into a parallel universe in which Boston is in Arizona or Miami? because last time i checked, Boston got just as much if not more snow than New York.

so to the geniuses at ESPN i say to you, "WHAT THE FUCK!?!?"

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Bioshock vs Incredibles

part of why i used to write in this blog is to point out how fucking retarded other people are. so i can show what stupid things they say. you the reader get to read these things and then laugh with me. i've been slacking off. so here's something to get it started again.

some jackass decided to compare the video game Bioshock (which is a great game) and the Disney film The Incredibles.

you can read it and draw your own conclusions. my conclusion is that he really really missed the fucking point.

- celebrating mediocrity. Bob's rant on celebrating mediocrity was meant as a critique on how pitiful modern society has made or is making kids. it was meant as a spit in the eye of every stupid sports league that insists EVERYONE gets a trophy no matter how shitty you play or how little effort you give. which leads to my next point.

- "and when everyone's special, no one will be" that quote from the movie spells it out. when you start rewarding everyone for doing the smallest of things, then the real accomplishments will mean nothing.

- this part was just plain funny.

My law professor once called "The Incredibles" a "Republican movie." There are those that are incredible, there are those that aren't incredible, and that's just the way life is. You have to just have "it" in you (i.e. in the "Republican" analogy, "it" would be wealth, power, or an overriding desire for those things) and if you don't, you're looked down upon. When I first heard him, I didn't really know what the hell he was talking about. But now, I think I've come to terms with it.

kinda slow on the uptake aren't you? it took me 2 seconds to figure out what your jackass liberal douche of a law professor was talking about. he sees the world as all liberals see it. the rich are evil and think that everyone who isn't rich is beneath them. it is the government's DUTY to take their money and give it to the poor, whether they earned it or not.

- he barely mentioned Bioshock. the point of which was that some form of authority is always going to come about and that if left unchecked it will always go out of control.

bottom line: what a moron.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Hey Gene

refresh me on your blog. shoot me a link in a comment here.