said it before and i'll say it again. polls are absolutely WORTHLESS
story was about a poll to gauge the american public thoughts on upcoming 2007. here's a few notes.
- the poll was done over the phone by calling 1000 people. that's right. calling 1000 people is supposed to be an indicator for how millions think.
- 35% said they think the military draft will be reinstated.
- then again, 25% said they thought Jesus was making a second-coming. so what does that tell you.
so next time you hear about a poll, just laugh.
Sunday, December 31, 2006
maybe this
The damned good looking!!!!
i think i figured out more on that joke thing. it wasn't JUST the joke, but the way it was told. the character just looks funny plus the smile after her tells it. still funny.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
dammit!!!
stupid stupid me. how could i forget? i'm adding to my top movie list again. baker's dozen folks.
Crank. how could i forget that movie. totally awesome movie. and the sex scene right in the middle of chinatown was priceless.
Crank. how could i forget that movie. totally awesome movie. and the sex scene right in the middle of chinatown was priceless.
joke
ever have one of those jokes that you know wasn't particularly funny, but for SOME unknown reason you couldn't stop laughing about it and it stuck in your head? i got one in me noggin thanks to Futurama. From the episode "A pharaoh to remember". for some reason i can't help but laugh every time i think of it.
The high priest during the pharaoh funeral:
The high priest during the pharaoh funeral:
"We commend the body of Hermenthotip to the abode of the damned.
The damned good looking!
Pharaoh commanded me to tell that joke at his funeral."
How to be
I never miss a chance to educate and inform. so in the spirit of education i present a video for the ladies.
How to be the perfect girlfriend
How to be the perfect girlfriend
Friday, December 29, 2006
yay
ghost riding the whip.
a new fad in which dumbasses leave the cars in forward motion, get out and dance on the roof while it's moving. needless to say, it's popular and it's causing injuries left and right.
my only question: isn't there some way we could encourage this? this is prime opportunity to weed out some undesirables in the gene pool. dudes that are fucking retarded enough to do this deserve whatever they get.
a new fad in which dumbasses leave the cars in forward motion, get out and dance on the roof while it's moving. needless to say, it's popular and it's causing injuries left and right.
my only question: isn't there some way we could encourage this? this is prime opportunity to weed out some undesirables in the gene pool. dudes that are fucking retarded enough to do this deserve whatever they get.
Stupid me
I'm going to add 2 more to my movies list for 2006. screw you, it's my blog. in the words of Cartman.... whateva....whateva....i do what i want!!!!
11 - The Departed. can't believe i forgot about this one. awesome fucking movie. everyone is at the top of their game in this. i'd like to offer an apology to Leonardo Dicaprio. i've never really given him his due as an actor. i'd like to include Brad Pitt in this apology too. mostly because they started out as chick flik heartthrobs and after listening to girls talk about how dreamy they are etc.... i just wanted to vomit. so i kinda had a built-in prejudice regarding them. but i'm man enough to admit when i'm wrong. they're both great actors and i'm a jealous jackass.
12 - Beerfest. what was extra nice about this movie was that i got to see it early at an advance screening at the Alamo Drafthouse theater. not only that, but i had my drinking buddies along for the ride.
11 - The Departed. can't believe i forgot about this one. awesome fucking movie. everyone is at the top of their game in this. i'd like to offer an apology to Leonardo Dicaprio. i've never really given him his due as an actor. i'd like to include Brad Pitt in this apology too. mostly because they started out as chick flik heartthrobs and after listening to girls talk about how dreamy they are etc.... i just wanted to vomit. so i kinda had a built-in prejudice regarding them. but i'm man enough to admit when i'm wrong. they're both great actors and i'm a jealous jackass.
12 - Beerfest. what was extra nice about this movie was that i got to see it early at an advance screening at the Alamo Drafthouse theater. not only that, but i had my drinking buddies along for the ride.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Cheating
seems like all the talk on sports somehow seems to include cheating nowadays. any athlete that accomplishes superhuman feats or breaks massive records is now under the eyeglass. of course, with guys like Bonds breaking the records and then acting like total douchbags, it makes it easier. of course it seems no sport is exempt anymore.
Indian chess player banned 10 years for cheating.
and spare me the "chess isn't a sport" comments. i know. you know what though, i got a varisty letter in high school for it just like the letters the football players got. mine actually means something because MY team was state champs 2 years in a row and we actually won games.
Indian chess player banned 10 years for cheating.
and spare me the "chess isn't a sport" comments. i know. you know what though, i got a varisty letter in high school for it just like the letters the football players got. mine actually means something because MY team was state champs 2 years in a row and we actually won games.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
movies of 2006
i can never stand reading the "top" lists of movie critics of self-important film snobs (like the people over at aintitcoolnews.com). they always hail these no-name artsy fliks as the best and it's total crap. so here's MY top 10. and i'm not ranking them, just the top 10.
so in no particular order.....
1 - Superman Returns. it's superman for the love of god. yeah the film had WAY too much romance in it (read: any) and not enough action. but it was well done and the plane rescue scene gave me goosebumps. let's hope the sequel has more action to it.
2 - Clerks 2. this movie was great. Randall continues to be one of the most awesome characters on film. i say that since i see a lot of me in him.
3 - Jackass 2. screw you holier-than-thou people who think you're "too sophisticated" to see a movie like this. it's funny. it's guys playing jokes on each other and doing wacky stunts. don't analyze, don't try and make a case for the decline of society. just laugh you bastards.
4 - Borat. it's offensive and just plain weird and yet it's hilarious.
5 - Saw 3. with the amount of boring dumbass horror films out, it's nice to see one that can still make you uncomfortable.
6 - V for Vendetta. the "v word" speech was priceless. what's great though was the sheer amount of people too stupid to know this wasn't a swipe at the Bush administration and that the best message you could've gotten from this movie is that if we're looking for someone to blame for the way things are we need only look in the mirror.
7 - Hostel. once again, nice to see a film that can make you squirm. not to mention it reminded me that i need to take a trip to the balkans.
8 - Pirates of the Caribbean 2. heh heh. pirates is cool.
9 - Xmen 3. action packed and enjoyable. can't wait for the Wolverine movie.
10 - Mission Impossible 3. action and fun. so what if Tom is crazy, at least he ain't telling me how to vote.
so in no particular order.....
1 - Superman Returns. it's superman for the love of god. yeah the film had WAY too much romance in it (read: any) and not enough action. but it was well done and the plane rescue scene gave me goosebumps. let's hope the sequel has more action to it.
2 - Clerks 2. this movie was great. Randall continues to be one of the most awesome characters on film. i say that since i see a lot of me in him.
3 - Jackass 2. screw you holier-than-thou people who think you're "too sophisticated" to see a movie like this. it's funny. it's guys playing jokes on each other and doing wacky stunts. don't analyze, don't try and make a case for the decline of society. just laugh you bastards.
4 - Borat. it's offensive and just plain weird and yet it's hilarious.
5 - Saw 3. with the amount of boring dumbass horror films out, it's nice to see one that can still make you uncomfortable.
6 - V for Vendetta. the "v word" speech was priceless. what's great though was the sheer amount of people too stupid to know this wasn't a swipe at the Bush administration and that the best message you could've gotten from this movie is that if we're looking for someone to blame for the way things are we need only look in the mirror.
7 - Hostel. once again, nice to see a film that can make you squirm. not to mention it reminded me that i need to take a trip to the balkans.
8 - Pirates of the Caribbean 2. heh heh. pirates is cool.
9 - Xmen 3. action packed and enjoyable. can't wait for the Wolverine movie.
10 - Mission Impossible 3. action and fun. so what if Tom is crazy, at least he ain't telling me how to vote.
Sports jerks in review
There's a great article on ESPN.com about just how much sports has gone to shit this year.
the article ranges from jackasses like Terrell Owens to Barry Bonds. i'm at a loss as to who the BIGGEST one was this year.
i think the frontrunner is owens. the man just can't stand to have the news NOT be about him. what's even better is how the media loved to talk about him grabbing headlines out of one side of their mouth while shoving those same headlines down our throats with the other side of their mouths. "later tonight, our report on terrell owens shamelessly grabbing more headlines, but first our top story, terrell owens in the headlines again". so while i think he's an ego-fueled ass, i shift a good portion of the blame at the media.
there are plenty of other nominees for BIGGEST jackass. Marcus Vick, a thug who is living proof that athletic talent makes you above the system. any other black man in Virginia who gives underage girls booze then waves a gun at people in a McDonald's parking lot would be in jail. no freaking question about it. no but instead he's been handed opportunities out the ying-yang and is currently a member of the Miami Dolphins. that's justice for you.
anyways, the article is worth a look.
the article ranges from jackasses like Terrell Owens to Barry Bonds. i'm at a loss as to who the BIGGEST one was this year.
i think the frontrunner is owens. the man just can't stand to have the news NOT be about him. what's even better is how the media loved to talk about him grabbing headlines out of one side of their mouth while shoving those same headlines down our throats with the other side of their mouths. "later tonight, our report on terrell owens shamelessly grabbing more headlines, but first our top story, terrell owens in the headlines again". so while i think he's an ego-fueled ass, i shift a good portion of the blame at the media.
there are plenty of other nominees for BIGGEST jackass. Marcus Vick, a thug who is living proof that athletic talent makes you above the system. any other black man in Virginia who gives underage girls booze then waves a gun at people in a McDonald's parking lot would be in jail. no freaking question about it. no but instead he's been handed opportunities out the ying-yang and is currently a member of the Miami Dolphins. that's justice for you.
anyways, the article is worth a look.
Monday, December 25, 2006
RIP James Brown
Truly a loss for the music world. This is probably one of if not the most influential artists ever. You will be missed Godfather. some tributes.
By Eddie Murphy from SNL
A mini-movie from BMW. Badass as hell
Classic James
More Classic - Papa's Got a Brand New Bag
Living in America - from Rocky IV
By Eddie Murphy from SNL
A mini-movie from BMW. Badass as hell
Classic James
More Classic - Papa's Got a Brand New Bag
Living in America - from Rocky IV
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Back
i've decided to start blogging again. life changes have given me a need to vent and ponder things. i've found blogging remains the best way to do so. what changes?
- employment. currently i'm working as tech support for AT&T's U-Verse service. if you don't know what it is then count yourself lucky. stay away till these yahoos get their shit together. at least another year. believe it or not, the customers don't bother me in this job. in fact, i feel SORRY for the customers. more on that later.
- Carrie. months ago i got back in touch with Carrie. we've been chatting since then and it's been a really good thing for us both. We've managed to clear the air on a lot of unresolved things from our past and find some closure. the main thing that's been great about it is that i'm more sure then ever that she is in fact the one true love i'll ever have. years later i still care more about her than any woman i ever met. unfortunately it also seals my belief that sometimes, love isn't enough and that just because you're meant for someone doesn't mean you'll end up with them. it's sad but it's a fact of life. i accept it.
- gaming. with my job and school i have like no time for gaming lately. it sucks ass.
anyways, that's the update. guess i'll find something useful to post later.
- employment. currently i'm working as tech support for AT&T's U-Verse service. if you don't know what it is then count yourself lucky. stay away till these yahoos get their shit together. at least another year. believe it or not, the customers don't bother me in this job. in fact, i feel SORRY for the customers. more on that later.
- Carrie. months ago i got back in touch with Carrie. we've been chatting since then and it's been a really good thing for us both. We've managed to clear the air on a lot of unresolved things from our past and find some closure. the main thing that's been great about it is that i'm more sure then ever that she is in fact the one true love i'll ever have. years later i still care more about her than any woman i ever met. unfortunately it also seals my belief that sometimes, love isn't enough and that just because you're meant for someone doesn't mean you'll end up with them. it's sad but it's a fact of life. i accept it.
- gaming. with my job and school i have like no time for gaming lately. it sucks ass.
anyways, that's the update. guess i'll find something useful to post later.
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